We are doomed. Well, almost. We might not survive if it continues like this. We have done enough damage to this world. The preparedness of our future generations is our last hope. Are we raising them to make this world a better place? This one question should poke our heads until we need not ask it again. Charity begins at home and so does teaching. You cannot simply push away the responsibility.
As a kid, everything that I’ve learnt has stayed with me till now. Two oneza twooo, that’s right. I remember it. The Earth is not round, it’s spheroid. That’s right, I remember it. Mrs. Rautela used to sell lipstick in the school. That’s right, I remember it. My school was built on a graveyard. That’s right, I remember it. When चोंचू नवाब died, नवाब साहब cried his heart out. That’s right, I remember it. Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell. That’s right, I am never forgetting it.
These are only a few of the lessons which are still stored in the infinite libraries of my brain. Sometimes you’ve so much time on your hands that you start reviewing everything. This lock down presented me with such an opportunity. Not that I wasn’t busy, but I had more time to think about a lot of things which I couldn’t do earlier.
Time is precious and so I straightaway devoted myself into analysing the most important piece of literature which one reads, the nursery rhymes! I’m sorry if I disappointed you by not discussing plays of Shakespeare or the philosophy of Socrates or the tacts of life in general by Chanakya. I’m a simple being who often writes anti-climax endings to his articles. This might not be any different.
It all begins with an evolving brain being fed with rhyming words which make no sense. Take up any poem taught to kids and I can do a step by step analysis of how misplaced it is in today’s time. I am pretty sure you remember this jingle:
Twinkle twinkle little star
How I wonder what you are!
Up above the world so high
Like a diamond in the sky.
I’m sorry if I break your heart with my analysis, but it is a free world and you should be able to deal with it.
So the poetess, Jane Taylor, begins with a very confusing thought. Mind you, this is the first poem taught to kids and it confuses kids.
The poetess starts off by pointing out that it is a star and then she begins to wonder what it is? I’m sorry what? And more importantly why? Imagine kids with such philosophy growing up and talking weirdly.
“Hi Rohan, what is this apple that you are holding?”
“Oh hi Ramesh. I’m wondering what this apple is, I’ll let you know once I’m done.”
“Ok sure Rohan, bye.”
After a neighbouring country really messed things up for everyone, it got me thinking. But now I have thought enough and I’ll debunk this whole mockery of primary education.
The next stanza is even worse. It infuses the thoughts of materialism into kids. The poetess straightaway says that the diamond twinkles like a star. Kids like shiny little objects and if in such a tender age they fall into the trap of materialism, what will this world turn into?
Having said that here are the summaries of other famous poems we are teaching our kids.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall;
All the king’s horses and all the king’s men
Couldn’t put Humpty together again.
With Humpty Dumpty we’ve told our future generations that the government cannot even do teeny tiny tasks like putting Humpty Dumpty back to its place. No wonder millennial folks don’t trust their governments.
And if you think climate change was unintentional and had nothing to do with our education, you might need to revisit what Little Johnny did.
Rain, rain, go away
Come again another day.
Little Johnny wants to play.
Rain, rain, go away
Sorry Johnny but you just costed us our planet. If your parents name you Johnny, be a Johnny Sins and not this ignorant and self centered little Johnny.
And lastly, if you think today’s songs are bad and they make no sense. I’m sorry to say but we are the reason for it. Why you ask?
One, two,
buckle my shoe.
Three, four,
shut the door;
Five, six,
pick up sticks.
Seven, eight,
lay them straight.
Nine, ten,
a big fat hen.
Having spent 22 years in educating myself I still can’t figure out what this means. Why does this mention a big fat hen? Are we really writing stuff for the sake of rhyming it. If that’s the intention then you really cannot blame today’s music when it goes like:
Chale jab tu latak matak
Laundon ke dil patak patak
Saansein jayein atak atak
Atta maajhi satak satak
The things we were taught transformed us into a generation which shall go into history, as the ones who believed in YOLO, the Earth being flat and that vaccines are a scam. From the generation which had Socrates who believed that choices made by humans are motivated by desires of happiness to the generation which sings latak-matak, patak-patak while setting fire to a deodorant can, I think we have failed.
It’s too late now. Even aliens won’t visit us because we are that stupid. I’m not cribbing, per say. I am just saying that we should teach the best of everything related to the current scenario. For instance there is this great poet, well almost a poet who writes beautiful poems on Instagram. His poems are masterpieces in themselves and they’ll really move you. You will actually feel your brain sending impulses to your hands to punch the so called almost poet’s paunch. See! Moving stuff.
P.S. In case you didn’t understand the article you might want to read, ‘The world of sarcasm by Mr. Jokerson Cringestone’
P.P.S. You can access the poet’s #notapoem series here: another.abhishek
Abhishek Singh 
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